Daryl's School of Women
by Fred Weasley's Forever
Summary: Glenn finds he is having a bit of trouble with hitting on women. Who better to turn to than the man all the ladies want? Daryl Dixon.
1. I Need Help

GLENN'S POV:

I sighed and sat on the wooden bench outside Herschel's house.

Why did I have to be so terrible with women? Maggie was way out of my league. Even now, with how few people I had to compete with.

I leaned my head back and listened to the wind blowing across the light blue sky ahead.

Then I heard Daryl and Jojo talking. They were like a couple. But neither of them would admit to themselves that they felt like that about each other. Everyone in the camp knew about them, though. Their levels of flirting were ridiculous, but he somehow managed to always get her to smile, or giggle.

Wait… That's it! I need Daryl's help! I've seen some of the other women eyeing Jojo jealously when she's with Daryl and they follow him with their eyes like hungry dogs. I just needed some help from Daryl.

I jumped up from the table and rushed over to where Jojo was walking off to join the rest of the women who were hanging up wet laundry. Daryl continued walking.

I caught up, but he gave me a weird look. "What do ya wan'?"

I hesitated, a little embarrassed. "Okay, so you seem to be pretty good with women." I said, gesturing to where all the girls were watching him out of the corner of their eyes.

They blushed and looked away when he turned to see what I was pointing out. He looked surprised. So he hadn't noticed.

"And?" he asked impatiently.

"I need some help. With Maggie." I admitted, looking down and wringing my hat in my hands.

Daryl's look of disbelief was almost funny. "Yer askin' me fer advice on women?"

I nodded.

He laughed and gestured for me to follow him as he walked off toward the bench I had been sitting at before. I sat down, as far from him as possible in case he remembered that he hated me.

"All ya need is the right pickup line," he explained, watching Jojo as she started wiping her wet hands off on her jeans.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

He gave me an impatient look and as Jojo was walking by, he whispered, "Watch and learn." Then, he called out to her, "Hey, Jojo!"

She turned around. "Yeah?"

"You dropped something'."

She looked around on the ground for a second then looked back up at him. "What?"

"My jaw."

She blushed and shook her head, walking away with the rest of the girls who glared at Jojo.

"Like that," Daryl said, oblivious to the looks of longing all the women were casting him.

I nodded. "Okay, yeah."

Daryl nodded. "Now you try."

I nodded, trying to think of something clever. I cleared my throat, having picked something up. "Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose."

Daryl gave me a confused look. "What?"

I reached up hesitantly and squeezed his nose. "Beep." My voice cracked with nervousness.

Daryl glared at me steadily. "That was th' worst goddamn pickup line I have ever heard." He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "We gotta lota work to do."


	2. I Lose

DARYL'S POV:

The kid was hopeless. His idea of flirting was helping a girl lift something heavy.

I groaned. "Okay, all ya need is a demonstration," I told him. "Watch me." I walked over to Jojo, who was leaning over the side of the bed of my truck. "Hey, there." I said, glancing back to make sure Glenn was well hidden and listening. I just barely saw him standing behind a tree a few feet away.

She looked up and smiled at me.

My heart stuttered and I tried to cheese that up as much as possible, pretending to be star-struck (maybe not too much pretend). "Did the sun jus' come out, or did you jus' smile at me?"

She grinned wider and giggled. She had the cutest damn giggle. "You're too sweet Mr. Dixon," she said, putting on a fake southern belle act, complete with holding her hand to her chest dramatically.

"I'm like chocolate pudding. I look like crap, but I'm sweet as can be."

She laughed harder at this and I thought I head a small snicker from a nearby tree. She rolled her eyes. "As if."

I gave her a puzzled look. "What's that s'posed to mean?" I asked.

She gave me an amused look. "You don't look like crap, Daryl, trust me."

I frowned, unsure of what she meant, but I dropped it. I walked to the cab and grabbed two bottles of water out of my bag in the truck and walked back to her. "I bet ya a bottle o' water I can kiss ya without usin' my lips," I said, smiling coyly.

She got that fire in her eye she always got whenever a challenge was proposed. That fire I loved so much. "You're on!" she said, smiling.

I nodded, my heart pounding in my ears. Sure Jojo and I had flirted and stuff like that before, but we had never done anything like what I was about to do.

I leaned in and kissed her full on the mouth, holding the back of her neck with my hand. She melted under the weight of the kiss and I heard Glenn laugh a little again. Then I pulled away, nowhere near satisfied. I wanted more. I would have to wait for that, though.

"I lose." I tossed her one of the bottles of water and walked away, passing by a group of women who were staring at me oddly. I had the feeling that they had seen the whole thing.


	3. The Sheriff's Wife

I woke up to Deeno shaking my shoulder. For a moment I thought I was back at home and Deeno was waking me up to tell me mom was making pancakes and dad was outside working on the house with our sister, June, being overly helpful just as her 12 year old stage of existence required. But when I opened my eyes and saw Deeno with a few blood smears crusted onto his cheek, sweat stained into his green shirt and his hair a dirty, disheveled mess, everything that had transpired in the past week came back to me in a cacophony of terrible images, haunting sounds, and memories that would always be burned into my mind.

I impulsively grabbed Deeno around the shoulders and pulled him to me, hugging him tightly. In this new world, my baby brother might be taken away from me at any moment. A few tears slid down the side of my face.

"You know mom would kill you if she saw how messy your hair was." I laughed.

He hugged me back and I heard him whisper, "Yeah."

When we pulled apart, I patted his cheek and he gave me a bittersweet smile that made me want to break down all over again. But I knew I couldn't. I had to be strong for him.

Daryl coughed. I had forgotten he was there. I looked over to see him pointedly turning his attention away from us. He looked like he felt pretty awkward.

The Asian boy was outside the truck, in front of it talking to an old man in a bucket hat and a Hawaiian shirt.

I hopped down out of the truck and examined our surroundings. We were stopped in the middle of a road to nowhere. There was only one house that could be seen far off in the distance and the rest of the landscape around us was waist-high yellowed corn stalks. There were a few telephone poles with wires strung between them, but other than that, the landscape was completely bare.

I stretched my arms out and yawned.

"And who is this?" the old man asked, smiling at me and Deeno and coming forward.

"Jojo," I said, holding out my hand.

"Call me Dale." He shook my hand firmly and moved to Deeno.

I turned and saw Daryl smirking at me.

"What?" I asked, walking toward where he was leaning out of the drivers' side door.

"Nothin'. Just that name's all." I was unsure of what he meant, but I didn't get a chance to ask before Deeno came up behind me and put an arm around my shoulders.

"Umm, Daryl, this is my little brother Deeno. Deeno, this is Daryl." I said, gesturing between the two.

They merely nodded at each other.

"I'm Glenn," said a voice from behind me. I turned along with Deeno to see the little Asian boy.

"Hi," I smiled and shook his hand. "I'm Jojo, his sister." I pointed up at Deeno.

"Oh, I know," he said. "He told me all about how y'all made it out there. I'm sorry about your family."

I gave Glenn a sad smile and muttered a "thanks."

"Alright everybody!" I heard a familiar voice shout out. It was the man in charge from last night.

Everybody started moving toward the front of the RV. The man in charge was a police chief it seemed. When Deeno and I came forward, he smiled at us and began talking, "We've got two new members. Why don't you two come over here."

We came toward him, feeling nervous with all the eyes on us. Which was stupid. The world had gone to hell and I was still afraid of public speaking?

"Could you give us your names?" the policeman asked.

Deeno started before I could, thankfully. I stutter a lot under pressure.

"I'm Deeno, and my sister is Jojo."

I was glad he picked up on the fact that I was going with the nickname my father had given me instead of my lame real name.

"I'm Rick," the police officer said, shaking our hands. "Everybody come introduce yourselves."

Everyone converged on us and I started feeling a bit claustrophobic. I stumbled over to the outside of the crowd of people surrounding Deeno. He was far more sociable than me. I ran into Rick in my hasty getaway.

"Sorry," I said, seeing that I had interrupted what seemed to be a heated conversation between he and Daryl.

"Oh, no its fine," he said, turning completely away from Daryl who merely scowled and slammed his door shut as he walked toward the back of his truck. "I hope Daryl didn't give you too much trouble." He sounded like he truly meant it.

I was shocked. How could he have given me any trouble? He was nothing but nice to me for the whole ride… or at least the parts I was awake for. "No, he was perfectly nice." I said, earning myself a look of disbelief.

"You… are you bein' serious?" he asked, a sincerely confused look on his face.

I nodded. "Why?"

He took a moment to think before saying, "He just usually is the sort to kick up a fuss about every little thing and start fights with anyone just because the wind didn't blow the right way."

Huh…

"Well, that's odd, he seemed like a really nice guy." I frowned.

"Well, be careful," he said, patting me on the shoulder and heading back to the group.

I looked back to the group who were now setting about various tasks. Then I turned my attention to Daryl, sitting on the open tailgate of the pickup.

I sighed and walked around the truck. His face was smeared with dirt and blood and sweat and his hair was sticking up in odd places. I sat up next to him on the tailgate, watching as he scoured the landscape for any shambling, moaning beasts that might have still been following us or just happened to be in the right place at the wrong time. Luckily there were none. He held a crossbow in his lap, finger on the trigger, bow drawn and cocked.

"What'ya want?" he asked, eyes narrowed as he searched the scene before him for anything out of place. His tone was a little more harsh than I was used to.

"Nothing, I guess. I just- umm…" I wasn't really sure what it was I did want. Maybe just company.

"Well? Spit it out woman."

My jaw dropped.

"Nothing I guess. Never mind. Bye." I hopped down from the tailgate and made my way over to the group of others. I frowned down at the ground, kicking small pebbles as I walked.

Maybe Rick was right about Daryl. But then again, maybe not. Maybe Daryl had just been in a bad sort of mood because he had overheard Rick talking to me. But then again, if that was his normal behavior, then maybe he had just been in a very good mood on the ride here.

I frowned deeper and kicked at another rock.


End file.
